I really hope you will be reading this, at least you will know how remorseful I am.
Learnt some truth today and all I want to say is, don't ask me what happened, I'm just blaming myself here. Don't comment on anything, don't try to console me cause I don't deserve it. Why am I always like that? Why am I always saying the wrong things? I meant it as a joke, do you even understand the meaning of a joke? Why do you take things so seriously? I never meant it the bad way. Why do you not understand what I'm trying to say?! Why did you misinterpret my intentions? I'm not trying to blame anyone here since I'm the one who said this. I started everything wrong in the first place. I shouldn't even have said it, not even as a joke. I really didn't mean it. If I didn't say anything in the first place, things could have been so much better, but I did and I can't rewind time. I really regret what I said. I'm an idiot I know, cause of my unintentional words, someone is suffering, bearing the consequences of my words alone while I got away scot-free.
I'm nothing but a trouble-maker, always creating trouble & problems for others, I really want to help but I always ended up making things worse. I'm an idiot, a useless, worthless piece of junk, only know how to be a burden to others. I know you don't blame me but I can't stop blaming myself cause I think it's really my fault for causing so much trouble. I want to lessen your burden but I only increased it by a great deal, I'm sorry. I know I used to say sorry alot of times until it may seem insignificant and useless now. I don't sound sincere, but I don't know what else can I do to redeem all the wrongs which I did.
If hating me will make you feel better, please do so. I'm really guilty. I still want to help you, but I don't think I have the chance anymore. I hate to admit this but it seems like you are much better off without me:( I'm really, really sorry. I know it's pointless to say anything now... life sucks, I'm a bad person, if you didn't get to know me & be my friend, if I didn't meet you, things will be better for you I guess. How I wish I've never appeared in your life before. I regret what I did, I really do. I'm very sorry. Please don't take it to heart, please forgive me. You have warned me not to say anything untruthful and let others be mistaken but I didn't heed your advice and now something really happened. I should have listened to you, stupid me, I'm a fool.
I want to shut my big mouth up, always causing problems, I'm too stupid, never consider people's feelings and always harming/hurting them. You will also be sad when you know this truth cause I unintentionally ruin your reputation and others may see you differently. I'm sorry. I don't want to harm/hurt you and I'm sorry that I still did it. I don't feel like talking anymore, I don't want to create more troubles, I'm really sad now. I really, really hate myself:(
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